Saying Goodbye

Yesterday the bad news came in. The news you are never ready to hear. I was at work and heard my cell phone ringing. Doesn't happen too often so I am always curious to see who is on the other line. I just missed it but saw it was Bryce. Immediately I get butterflies. Wonder what is going on. Bryce doesn't call that often. I wait for the voicemail beep and listen. He is upset, my heart drops. My phone rings again, its Bryce. "Hello, what's going on?" long pause "Todd died today" "Whhhhhhat, what do you mean, my brother Todd?" "Yes", "NO, no he didn't", "yes he is gone". I could immediately feel all the color in my face leave. I didn't know what to say. You are never prepared to get news like this.
I am still in a bit of shock and disbelief. This is hard and I want to believe that it is not true.

Todd was a good guy. He had a big heart. He was sensitive and emotional. He was always good for a big hug. He liked to joke (especially about the Monkeys at the Zoo) and he LOVED to fish (especially with Damon)

I think Todd's greatest joy was when he was reunited with his daughter Kierra about 2 years ago. He was one proud daddy watching her graduate. And for many years he always hoped that he would get to see her again. I'm so happy that it happened in this lifetime. I only wish that his other 2 boys would have come around.

Life was never easy for Todd. He struggled with bad choices and different addictions and we had our differences throughout the years. We crossed a rough road a few years ago and we didn't speak often. The last time I talked to him was when Myles was born 8 months ago and he called me to say Congrats. And even when Todd heard that Matt lost his job and I was asking people to give me diapers for Myles for my birthday because I didn't know what we were going to do....Todd only had $5.00 to his name and he said "Its my last $5.00 I would gladly give it to her if it will help" He was unemployed himself.

I know that he was so happy when Luke was born not quite 2 years ago. He was happy to have a chance to watch one of his children grow. And he was happy to be a Grandpa when Alexyce was born. It breaks my heart for the both of them that it has ended before it really has even begun.

I just hope that Todd knows that even through all the nonsense and tough times that I loved him. I always wanted good things for him. I think and hope that somewhere in his mind that he knew this. It definately was tough love. But it was still love.

When someone dies so unexpectedly I guess it is normal to have some guilt and some what if's, or if I had only done this...... Like I said I guess you are never really prepared for news like this. He was going to be 42 in January. His son turns 2 in February.

I will never forget the hours we would spend in the card aisles reading and laughing at all the cards. And I will certainly never forget the time at the Hogle Zoo (you never did stop laughing about that) or the time when you came upstairs wearing that tight orange shirt just to get back at me for something I had said to you. That was a good laugh. I will never forget the time you were late coming into Portland "because your luggage had gotten lost" ;) and I won't forget the time that we went fishing on the Snake river and Eric hooked Debbie in the lip and mom shouted out " Fish on" . I won't forget the time that you let Damon and I come over to your apartment when you lived behind the bar and you told us all about the ghosts that lived there and then we went into the bar to see if we could find some. That was so scary and so funny. We had some good laughs. You taught me how to cook scrabbled eggs and hooked me on one of my favorite food combinations, cottage cheese and potato chips.

This saddens my heart to see you leave this life so early. I hope that you are at peace now and with Grandma and Grandpa somewhere in Heaven. And I hope that you will do good works in the after life.

I will miss you and please know that I love you.

P/L/F - Heather

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Weenie Roast

We had a back yard dinner tonight. It was a lot of fun. Roasted hot dogs over the fire and smores after. Keegan had a blast he even wanted to dance with grandma. It was a great family dinner. Something every dad loves to see. Campfire dinners!

Mr. Cool

Oh my gosh! Where did my baby go. Who is this big boy. If you ask him he says "I'm Keegan"

Today I finally gave in and decided to pay for him to have a haircut. Can you believe that it costs $10 plus tip to cut a childs hair. I watched her very closely so that I can do it myself next time. Assuming that I buy some scissors. Anyway, this is a picture of Keegan today coming out of the salon. He cried the entire time. They even tried to calm him down with a sucker but that didn't work. Daddy had to hold Keegan on his lap. I had to laugh because the stylist was Russian and in her accent as she cut his hair she would say "there now you look like a boy, now you look like a cute boy" . I know his hair was long, but he in no way looked like a girl so it made me laugh.

Keegan doesn't like to have his picture taken. I am not sure why, but he refuses to look at the camera and if you can manage to trick him into looking at the camera by saying "there's grandma" then he is never smiling. Or if you can convince him to sit and smile for a minute he always looks away from the camera right as you go to take it. Uggh!

Keegan speaks very well and has a large vocabulary. He surprises us all the time with words and phrases that he knows, and it makes us giggle everytime. Today we told him we were taking him to the museum and he clasped his hand over his mouth with excited and yelled out "Oh my Goodness"

We love you Keegan. Now stop growing so fast. We aren't ready for you to be all grown up.

6 months and growing

My baby Myles is 6 months old today. I can't hardly believe it. It just seems like yesterday that we brought our beautiful baby boy home. Myles is such a joy. He is a very happy baby and he is pretty content. His favorite thing to do is bounce in his bouncy chair. He loves to watch Keegan and giggles and giggles. Myles smiles all the time. He is a really good sleeper. He has slept through the night since he was 8 weeks old. He is usually ready for bed by 8:30pm each night. He loves sleeping in his crib. He has mastered rolling from his belly to his back and his back to his belly. He started eating rice cereal when he was 5 months old because momma just couldn't keep up. Now that he is 6 months old we have started to feed him baby food. So far he has had banana, peaches, and apricots. Now that he has had a taste of the good stuff he is not happy with just rice cereal anymore and boy does he let you know it. The only time he gets really fussy is when he is hungry and then he cries, really LOUD! He is definately a momma's boy and mommy doesn't mind it at all. His eyes will follow me around the room just waiting for me to kiss on his cheeks. I don't have his weight yet. We still need to make his check up appointment but if I am guessing he is somewhere around 20 pounds. He is heavy and has worn out my left arm.
The last 6 months have been such a blessing and such a struggle with Matt losing his job, unemployment being denied, searching for work and trying to pass tests.
I am glad that the kids are young and hopefully won't remember this struggle. I hope that we will always show them how much we love them and will provide them with a sense of safety and security.
We love having Myles in our home. He is such a blessing and his smile can brighten any day.
Happy 6 months my little buggy, my little tiny tiger. We love you.

Cooking with Mommy

Cooking brownies with mom

Keegan's 1st Catch

Grasshopper

(he calls it a Catipillar)

Cure JM Champion

Damon,
 
I wish I would have thought ahead of time to make you a certificate.  But it didn't cross my mind until last night and that was too late.  And as we drove home from Coyotes I thought, well maybe I should have stood up and said a few words about you, but again it didn't cross my mind until it was too late.  And I am much better at writing than I am at speaking so I decided the least I could do is send out an email to applaud you.
 
Now I have known Damon all of my life.  I have been blessed to have him as my older brother.  Someone that I can look up to, lean on and go to whenever I have a serious real life question or circumstance for which I need advise.  And Damon is honest with me and up front with me.  He isn't afraid to speak his mind. I have seen Damon fight before (usually using his fists on the side of my arms ) jk, but I have never seen Damon fight with such heart, and passion for something that he truely wanted and believed in.
From the day the idea of a benefit concert came to mind, Damon stepped forward and took the bull by the horns.  He dedicated hours and hours, and had many restless nights organizing and planning and leading such an event.  He put himself out there.  He and his family made sacrifices.  He told Mason's story which sometimes might be a hard thing to do, but it was so heartfelt.  He worked as a full time employee, as a full time father and care giver and as a full time event planner.   I saw Damon on a few occassions where I would say, "How are you, you look exhausted" and he always said "I do?, Well I'm doing good"  He pushed through and he persevered. 
 
Damon gave us praise last night for our contributions to the concert and the donations.  But I just wanted to make note that Damon brought in a lot of the donations.  Through his work and story he was able to meet with the Stewart and Lucille Foundation and they were a major contributor to this event.  Through his work and story he was able to reach out to Savannah and her family from a letter that he left on the doorstep.  And Savannah was a major part of the success. 
 
I know last night Damon said that some may have gotten tired of all the meetings, but I know for Matt and I we always looked forward to them.  For me personally I looked forward to them because it gave me a little bit of time to see Damon, with all that was going on we didn't have time to see each other much over the last 8 months.  So I always looked forward to that and I always looked forward to the meetings because I came away inspired and re-energized to go and do and find more stuff that would help with the success of the concert.  It was exactly what we needed.
 
None of us knew how successful this concert was going to be.  I'm sure there were many times when we all stressed about the outccome and the tickets sales and I remember getting an email from Damon and he said well I don't know if we are going to have any people there, but it will put a big smile on Mason's face, and for that it is all worth it.
 
That is one thing about Damon.  He LOVES his family.  He tries to make things special for them and to spend special time with all of them.  I have not in my lifetime witnessed a greater love from a Father to his Son and a Son to his Father than I have witnessed now from Damon and Mason and the Cure JM Benefit Concert.  Your smile at the end of the event told it all.
 
Thank you Damon for all of your time, hard work and bringing the Concert to life. Thank you for letting us be a part of it and thank you Damon for letting us be a small part of your "Miracle".

You applauded all of us last night as you told your stories about each of us and gave us praise as a team.  But every good team must have a good Leader.  And for that I am so proud of you and I stand and applaud you.  Job well done brother.  Job well done.
 
I love you,
Heather

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Potty Training Complete

Well I am happy to say that Keegan has graduated from potty training.  He has gone to bed without diapers for four nights now.  His first night was August 19, 2009.  We crossed our fingers as we layed him to sleep in his big boy underwear and it worked. He wears his big boy underwear all day.  He has gotten really good at telling us when he needs to go potty.  We are so proud of Keegan.  He is such an amazing little boy who brings us so much joy, (and a little bit of grief).  Potty training was not an easy task and really not a very pleasant task.  We are happy to be through it.  And we couldn't be prouder.  Way to go Keegan!!!

Who needs a title. Just watch the vid.

Myles is in a great mood today

Myles Snoring

Listen careful and you can hear him snore.

Our little one talking

Myles loves to talk and roll around. Here is a little 1 min. Video I made at the museum today. We needed to just get out of the house.

Funny Keegan Tidbits # 2

Well, this morning when Grandma came to watch Keegan & Myles while I study, Keegan told Grandma where to sit, then asked her to come and play with the toys. Grandma said that it would be hard to play if she sat where he put her. Here is the funny part. Keegan replied with a funny look and grin, "It will be fuuuunnn!" LOL

It was soooo cute. Where he comes up with these things, we don't know.

Funny Keegan Tidbits

Keegan is talking so good now and he is quite humerous. Here are few things he says that make us laugh:

Every day we ask him how he is and he always says "I'm Mad" and he crosses his arms and stomps around.

The other night he wanted a movie out of the car and he asked me to go and get it. I said "No it is late, I don't want to go and get it" and he said "OH Come onnnnnn"

He loves trains and he just got a little wooden one and he plays with it all day saying "Choot, choot" and moves his arm up and down and then he hollers out "Alls aboard"

If he gets in trouble he will say "Mommy are you mad" and I say "yes" then he will rub my arm saying "sorry mommy" then he will look at me and get a cute cheesy smile on his face and say "are you Happy"

He is so funny and growing up so fast. We love you Keegan.

Thank you Keegan

Thank you Keegan for flooding the bathroom this morning. It forced us to give the bathroom a good scrubbing. Finding the positive in a given situtation. That is the story of my life these days :)

Cure JM Concert Update

Fit like a glove

You're all probably wondering what the heck have I got going on here. Well I am wondering the same thing. You see it is a work thing. This is the newest news on good foot care. Haha. The thought is that our feet hurt because of the shape of shoes that we have been wearing for many many years. So this is an attempt to shape my feet back to the way nature had intended by spreading the toes and wearing flat shoes. The newest shoe in office is the Croc. Although I don't have any....YET! I swore I would never get a pair of those Croc shoes because my biggest complaint was that people were wearing the most awful color of shoes with clothing that completely clashed and I hated it. So fret not, I will someday be getting a black pair of Croc to go with all of my black clothing :) And I will have the most comfortable wide amazon like feet that you have ever seen. :) compliments of Dr. Ross.

He's growing up sooo fast

Here is my baby Myles at 4 months old. He went to the doctor with Keegan the other day & she said Myles has two teeth that are coming in. I'm not ready. I love his gummy smile. I want him to slow down.

A Fun Day

Yesterday we decided to take a drive to the Coast for the day. We wanted to just have a fun day with each other and get away from all the craziness that is going on right now in our lives. We first went to Gerheart Beach because you can drive on the beach and we found a place to park and picnic. It was so fun. Keegan absolutely loved being in the sand. I looked over at him and he was rolling in it and making sand angels. Then he found this big piece of driftwood and he carried it around. We walked over to the ocean and he would stand kinda close but when the water would start coming in and get close to him he would take of running to the car screaming Ahhhhh! Then we drove to Seaside and we decided to go to the Aquarium. This is not really the best Aquarium but Keegan enjoyed it. The seals are funny although I didn't get any pictures of them, but the slap their sides and bark at people to get some fish. Keegan enjoyed watching them. If you were too close they would splash you as they begged for food. We walked around and looked at the different fish in the tanks and they had 2 large octopus. Pretty sure the one in the picture wanted to eat Keegan. He got very active when Keegans little head was peeking in the window. Keegan also had fun petting the starfish. He wasn't too sure at first but he at least tried it. We were all tuckered out by the time we headed home, but it was a really fun day with the family.

It's not funny anymore

If you have had a chance to read my last post you will understand the title of this post once I tell you. Ok so today Matt comes home and he says to me. The auto body place that we took our car to to have fixed after being rear-ended called him today. I said yeah. He continues by saying..... well the guy that backs the vehicles out of the shop for them backed our car into the brick building so the back corner is now smashed. But don't worry because they are going to take care of the damage 100%. Really! Is there really a question as to who would be responsible for that. Oh and we may be responsible for the towing because it was a dead battery and not due to the accident. That is total of $135.
Ok seriously stop laughing because it just isn't funny anymore.

The Good is just around the Corner

I haven't blogged in a long time because we have had all kinds of changes in our lives over the last few months and we have been busy trying to make decisions and get a new way of life figured out. I would say that since May I have gone through some of the scariest moments in my life so far. First of all Matt lost his job and that is really scary when we depend on his income to live. Unemployment took about 6 weeks to make a decision. So we have been living on my income alone and just taking it one day at a time with lots of faith and many many prayers. We are finally past the devistation and moving onto the opportunity side of things. Matt worked really hard over the last month to find another job. He spent many hours sending out resumes and the good news is he has been offered a position with Country Financial which he had to go through 5 interviews to get but he isn't on the payroll until he is licensed which is going to take another month plus. So we are still hanging in there. Our health insurance ran out the end of June and we are still trying to find some coverage for the family to get us through until we can get coverage through Matt's new job. My job does not offer health insurance. Independent insurance is expensive, of course there is affordable coverage out there that can get you by but if anything happens you are facing a large deductible. Which I guess would be better than footing the whole bill if anything major happened. Anyway, it is a huge change for us because we have had really good health coverage through Intel and we have not had to budget this before. Another change that is still in the air is child care. Before, we had our schedules arranged that the kids would be taken care of between Matt, myself and Grandma Dallmann. With the new change in Matt's schedule we aren't sure just yet how we are going to get it worked out. I keep praying that I will not have to take my kids to daycare. There are many reason why I don't want to and among one of those is the cost. Again we haven't had to budget for this before and don't know where the money will come from.
Once Matt got the news that Country wanted him on their team we were so excited and felt a huge relief. At the same time we got news that the Unemployment was accepted and he would begin receiving a weekly check. All good news. So we were looking up about things and beginning to feel pretty good......until this week came along.
I am off of work this week with no pay. That stinks...I used up all my vacation time when I had Myles and Dr. Ross always closes the office this week. Then on July 2nd we were driving into Portland and a kid ran into the back of our car. It wasn't a really hard hit which is good and we are all ok. But now we have to deal with taking the car to get fixed, and then trying to find a way not to have to come up with a $500 deductible up front. On July 4th I drove to Target and then to Kohl's and when I tried to start the car to come home it wouldn't start. So I started walking home on a very very hot day and luckily Kristen came to pick me up. We had the car towed and it turned out that it was a dead battery which cost us $92. On July 6th I was upstairs making Keegans bed and he was running around up there. He came into his room with his mouth open and drooling pointing inside his mouth. I ran over to see what he had in there thinking something was lodged in his throat but instead smelt Mentholatum. I knew right away that he had gotten into the humidifier and I didn't know if he had drank it or what so we had to call Poison Control. Luckily it turned out not to be a big deal. We just had to wipe his mouth out and give his a popsickle to get the yucky taste out. Apparently it happens alot according to the operator and unless he drinks half a bottle it wouldn't harm him. So we are beginning to think that things wills start to settle down and then last night, July 7th we were eating dinner and Keegan was sitting on a chair at the table and I don't know what he did but the chair fell backwards to the ground with him in it. He started screaming as we rushed to pick him up and realized that his mouth was bleeding. If you didn't know, I learned this trick from my mom. To stop bleeding in the mouth you pour a spoon of sugar on the area and the bleeding stops, not only that but the kid doesn't mind because it tastes good. I don't know what he hit his teeth on but he knocked both of his front bottom teeth loose. Again we have no insurance right now so we were scrambling at what to do. We called the on call Dr. for the pediatriacian and again they said to give him a popsickle for the swelling and keep and eye on him. Matt was terrified that the teeth were broken and they were obiously moved (crooked) so he called Kaiser, which is where Matt and I HAD insurance. They said that since Keegan wasn't a member they wouldn't give Matt any advise. Matt said, he is only 2, you won't give advice about a 2 year old that just knocked his teeth loose and then he said to the lady, you have no heart for a 2 year old and the lady replied, NO. So then we called a dentist that we had used in the past and he called us back and told us to come in first thing this morning and he would look at Keegan's teeth. We told him that we didn't have any insurance and the dentist said just bring him in and we will figure out what to do. Then last night as we were settling down for bed I went to use the bathroom and Matt was holding Myles when Keegan decided to roll off of our bed onto his head. It made a terrible noise followed by loud crying. I think that is just scared him more than anything but still scary. Our nerves were fried by the time we tried to sleep. Oh yeah and then Myles had a tummy ache a cried and cried for about an hour before he went to sleep. Then Keegan woke up screaming about midnight and I think he might have had a tummy ache. We were up with him for about an hour. Finally this morning we went to the dentist and they took an x-ray. He did knock both teeth loose and they shifted from the bone. There wasn't anything the dentist could do at this point. He said to keep an eye on them for infection or if the teeth start to turn grey. If they turn grey that means the nerve is dying and the teeth will have to be removed. Good thing they are just baby teeth and would fall out anyway, but he would be toothless for about 4 years. We are praying that the teeth will just heal on their own and just be a bit crooked. The dentist's office was very sympathetic and they only charged us $20. I guess the receptionist told me $26 but I thought she said $20 so she just took it and said that was fine she would just write off the rest. How lucky is that.
So that brings me to the title of this post. The good for us just has to be around the corner. With everything we will get through this and are looking forward to the time when things will be calm and peaceful around here. Until then, please just keep praying for us.

Holding his own.....

Holding his own bottle that is. Matt and I took the kids to the childrens museum and I stopped to feed Myles. He decided that at 3 months he can hold his own bottle. Super Kid!

There's a Party in my Tummy

Most of you are probably not familiar with Yo Gabba Gabba, but it is a daily show in our household. This is Brobee. I had to laugh when I took this picture. There is a show that plays that is called "Eat" and Brobee sings a song about the food wanting to go to the party in his tummy, so yummy, so yummy. And he asks all the food on his plate if they want to go to the party in his tummy. The food that is left on the plate starts to cry because they want to go to the party in his tummy too.

Keegan usually eats cereal, or oatmeal and toast, or pancakes for breakfast. I thought I would try to feed him scrabbled eggs and a slice of bacon for breakfast on Saturday. He ate the bacon and then threw the eggs around. I guess he decided that Brobee would eat the eggs because the eggs wanted to go to the party in his tummy.

Oh Keegan, he is a funny one.

Brothers

I can't believe how fast my two little boys are growing up. Myles is nearly 2 months old already. The time has gone so quickly. We are finally adjusting to having him here and Keegan is getting along with him pretty well. I even hear him singing Twinkle Twinkle to Myles sometimes and he is always sure to say "I love you baby brother" before going to bed. He likes to touch Myles face and give him kisses and he doesn't really understand right now why he can't do that because he has a cold and I am trying hard not to let Myles get a bad case of it. Keegan is such a sweetie and he is really learning his manners. He says please, and thank you and no thank you, and your welcome most of the time. He still struggles with I'm sorry but we are working on that. Right now Keegan favorite thing to do is go outside and ride on the train. I will have to take a picture of him doing that one of these days. But he absolutely loves it. It is a little battery operated train that has a track and he can sit on it and go around in circles. That was a good garage sale find. Keegan loves being outside and it doesn't matter if it is rain or shine. He just wants to be out there doing what little boys do. Getting into things he shouldn't (like dog poop) and getting dirty in whatever dirt he can find. Keegan is talking really good and saying full sentences. You can almost have a conversation with him. He is super funny. We saw uncle Damon the other day in town and when we stopped to talk for a minute he made uncle Damon laugh by showing him all his funny faces. He isn't always a cutie though. The last few weeks we have taken him to an indoor playland where he can run around and play and we have discovered he is a bully. Each time that we have gone there have only been 1 or 2 other kids there and Keegan pushes them and takes their toys away and the worst was yesterday he slapped a girl really hard across the face. I was horrified. Why does he do this. We don't slap or hit him so I don't know where he learns it. He isn't around other kids often so he doesn't learn it from them. And I am guessing because he isn't around other kids that is why he is possesive of everything. Definately something we have to work on. Keegan is now sleeping in his big boy bed every night. We took the crib from his room the other day and put it in what is going to be Myles room. Keegan still goes in there and says "Keegan's baby bed". We haven't started potty training just yet because there is so much going on right now and so much change as it is I don't want to overwhelm him even more. However, I can hardly wait to get him out of diapers. Keegan has also discovered "scary" and he says it alot about things that look different. He has become scared of the reflections in our windows in the living room at night time and he makes us close the blinds. His favorite food right now is a soft taco. We usually have them once a week and then Keegan will eat up any left overs. I think that pretty much sums up Keegan.

Myles is growing fast. He is sleeping pretty good. He is going to sleep around 1opm and then waking up around 3:30-4am. I keep hoping that he will start sleeping until at least 5am. Just a matter of time I guess. He is smiling alot now when you hold him and change his diaper. He is a 2 diaper for every change kind of kid. He waits for a clean diaper to finish his business. I feel like I am buying diapers all the time. I need to find the good deals on diapers. I am going broke. Myles is starting to find his voice and he lets out little coos and small giggles. I just love it. He still likes to be held, but he is a good cuddler. Currently he still has his touch of red hair and blue eyes. I haven't weighed him yet but he is eating good. He has already made it into 6 mnth clothing. He is such a cutie and I just love having him here.

As for me, I am getting ready to go back to work. Only 12 days left until my official return. Where did the time go. In one hand I am looking forward to it, and in the other hand I'm really not. I would like to keep working just less hours. I don't know how but someday I hope that will be possible. I want to spend more time with my family. Every now and then I get a nap in but most of my day is spent playing, chasing, feeding, rocking, dancing, coloring, tickling, cooking and cleaning. By the end of the dayI am exhausted and fall asleep within minutes of my head hitting the pillow. In fact Matt usually turns on the TV and I tell him to watch a show that I want to watch instead of one that he chooses and then I fall asleep immediately and he ends up watching what I decided. haha. I told him he doesn't have to do that anymore. He can watch extreme home makeover , or Dr. G medical examiner from now on. I'm usually pretty tired when Keegan comes in in the mornings. Getting up with Myles everynight takes a toll on this old body. I have lost all my baby weight and even a little more so I am thrilled with that. However I look at myself and think maybe I shouldn't tell anyone that I lost the baby weight because this is how big I was before getting pregnant. Oh man. I keep thinking that I am going to get up at 5am and go out walking and jogging. But then it is always dark at that time and I let myself think of scary things that could happen to me out on the streets in the wee morning hours by myself. I would love to have a gym membership and a really good pedicure right now. :)

Well that pretty much sums it up. This is our life at this moment.

It's True

This is a picture of Myles. He is now 6 weeks old. Such a cutie pie.

This face says it all

Oh Keegan. You always make me laugh. Some day you are going to love being the big brother. I love you.

Totally Cool

Oh Myles. You are so cute and cuddly at this age and growing so big. I love you.

Cute Picture

Don't you wonder what he is thinking? My guess is he is thinking, Keegan you better watch out! I may be the little brother but some day I'm going to be bigger than you and I'm gonna get you.

Just chillin

Yesterday Myles slept the whole day. Today he wanted to be awake all day. Which is fine other than when he is awake he wants to be held. If you don't hold him he cries. So we got all dressed up and went for a drive. Something about a car ride makes a baby want to sleep. This is how he was after our outing. Quiet time for mommy. Wait, I forgot Keegan is still awake. Ok so no quiet time, but I sure love my boys.

Growing Like A Weed

This video of Myles was taken about a week ago. He is growing and changing so much right now. He pretty much went from wearing new born clothing to wearing 6 month clothing, skipping right over 3 month stuff. He loves to eat and he is getting chunky. The hardest thing about Myles is that he loves to be held. Which isn't such a horrible thing but when we have two year old Keegan fighting for attention we can't just sit around and hold Myles. If Myles is awake and you aren't holding him he is screaming. It becomes a little much sometimes. He works himself up all sweaty when he cries. You pick him up and his whole back and head are sweaty. Ewwww! Lots of bath time for baby Myles. But he really is a darling and we just love having him.

Bug watching

I think this picture is pretty hilarious. I think that Keegan will have to wear these glasses the next time that we go bug hunting.

Hoppy Easter Every Bunny

Today was a big day for Easter Egg Hunts. I was super excited to take Keegan out. This is his third Easter but this was the first year that he would be able to understand what was going on and really have fun hunting for eggs. Our original plan was to just get up and go to the Alpenrose Dairy as they have a big Egg Hunt every year and they also have a hunt for diamond earring for the moms. However, when I was in Albertson the other day I saw a sign that said they would have the Easter Bunny and an Egg Hunt this morning. So I told Matt that I wanted to take Keegan there just in case the weather was too bad and we couldn't take him to the other. I remember when I was a kid our big Hunt was down the aisles of Smith's grocery when it was over by our house. So I kinda laughed about the thought doing the same thing with Keegan. I said to Matt when we pulled up, I hope this isn't lame. (The reason that thought crossed my mind is because at Christmas time they said free pictures with Santa and when we got there, it was not well done and they had a cross eyed Santa) So we went inside and the store had the whole meat section blocked off and then had the kids gathered around. The floor was covered with plastic eggs and candy galoure and there weren't very many kids. Some of the eggs had paper in them that had a prize. So the whistle rang and we were off, well at least Matt and I. Keegan grabbed one egg and wanted to open it before he moved on. We kept hollering, get it Keegan get more, fill your basket. He didn't really care about that. He kept looking around and saying "Easter Bunny where are You?" and then he would go and look for the bunny. In the meantime we were trying not to take all the candy from the kids, and Albertson's had good candy. We were modest about it. Needless to say, it ended up being a lot of fun. There wasn't a crowd and Keegan got his fill of eggs and the prizes that he won were, 3 one pound bags of carrots, I guess that is so you can eat a piece of candy and then try to make yourself feel better by eating a carrot, he won a corn dog and a hot chocolate. I think we will be back for this hunt again next year. Super fun.

Next we were off to the Alpenrose Dairy for another easter hunt. The ride over there took us almost an hour with the amount of traffic that was headed that way. The crowd was huge and they threw chocolate eggs on the grass and then released the kids to gather as they could find. Keegan did pretty good. He wasn't really that interested and Matt got a little crazy by the crowds. Instead of seeing the Easter Bunny that was supposedly there we saw a Moose. I don't know what the Moose had to do with Easter, but ok. Keegan was scared of the Moose and he has been walking around saying, "Moose is scary" We decided not to stay for the mother's diamond hunt because the crowd was massive. There were thousands of people there today. By this time it was getting cold and Myles was hungry so we decided to take our chocolate eggs and go home. We probably won't do that one again, but we might visit the dairy again. There were lots of attractions to look at there and on a nicer day we will go back.

Keegan over all had a fun time. I think he has eaten so much candy that he is refusing to take a nap or eat any lunch. I wonder what the Easter Bunny has in store for him tomorrow.

Hoppy Easter Every Bunny.

So Proud of You

It is time to play a little catch up.  A little over a week ago we decided to move the queen mattress into Keegan room so that he could start trying to sleep in a Big Boy Bed.  We figured we would start off by trying to get him to take naps on there and then we were crossing our fingers that we could move to night time sleeping.  It started off really slow, and naps went ok.  There was a lot of getting up and opening the door and daddy standing outside saying " go lay back down"   We decided that we weren't going to push the issue really hard because Keegan has already been through a lot of change since bringing the baby home.  When we take him upstairs we ask him if he wants to sleep in the Big Boy Bed and at first for awhile he would say no, he wanted the baby bed.  Well about 3 days ago he told Matt that he wanted to sleep in the "Good Boy Bed" that is what Keegan calls it.  So Matt went up to rock a bye and Keegan wasn't too interested in it.  He just looked at daddy and said
"Good Boy Bed"  so Matt laid him down and sat in the chair for a few minutes and then left the room.  We were quite expecting him to be in and out of our room the whole night with this new freedom, but much to our surprise he didn't come in until morning.  He had slept in the Big boy bed the whole night.  I guess that first night he did cry a little so I went in to check on him and he said "mama lay down" so I did lay there for about an hour.  We were so proud of you Keegan.  That was a pretty big deal.  So we have tried it the last 2 nights as well and he has done GREAT!!!!  He is sleeing in the Big Boy Bed all by himself.  I absolutely love about 7:30 in the morning when he comes running in our room screaming " Hi Daddy"  then he crawls up on the bed and snuggles with us for a few minutes.  He is growing so much and as much as I miss the smallness of our little boy, I love to see how much he grows and changes.  I just want him to know that we are so so so proud of him, he is such a funny little boy and he is such a blessing to our lives and our family and I am looking forward to seeing his example as a big brother.  I love you Baby K.

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Simply Irrisistable

Cool Dude

We are on our way to Tillamook for an icecream today. Now for those of you who know how far Tillamook is then you will think we are crazy and laugh at us. I guess I have a little of my dad in me. But here is a cute picture of Keegan in his cool sunglasses all dressed up and ready to go. Happy sunny Saturday.

Growing

This is a picture of Myles at 3 weeks old. He is growing so much so fast. This little guy seems to be hungry all the time. He always wants something in his mouth. He gets fussy when he doesn't have something to suck on. However, tonight his daddy cradled him and he sat with daddy so calmly for quite awhile. It was refreshing to have him just sit calmly without looking like he is starving. Myles is really strong. He holds his head up alot. He is still so stinking adorable I just melt everytime that I look at him. I really want to cherish the time I get to be with him before I have to head back to work full time. It is going by so quickly. He is truely a blessing to our family and I just love him to pieces.

Goodbye ole Blue

Well the time has come for us to give back the winning Mini Van. It was a sad day. The van has worked out so nice for us. We will miss the automatic opening doors, the built in dvd player and all the extra space. The van took us many places, here and there. We even traveled across seas to foreign territory together. We counted on the van to take us back and forth to Idaho on several occassions. We enjoyed traveling with company in the comfort of her 7 seats. She was a trusty ole van.
We only had to put it in the shop 4 times while we had her in our 1 year. But we knew the day would come when we would have to say our goodbyes. We asked about keeping her, but the dealer was insistant on getting her back. The price to keep her was beyond our limits. So it just wasn't meant to be. We parted ways but not without a fight. Upon preparing to leave behind the keys for good the dealer decided that he wanted to charge us $150 cleaning fee. I don't think so. So upon another trip to Woodburn we took her to Purdy's car wash where she was cleaned and dried for the grand price of $1. The dealer was rude to us when returning her because we wouldn't buy another vehicle from them. But there was no clause in the lease saying that upon return we had to buy a vehicle. So we handed over the keys for good and left her behind. There is no doubt that she will make another family very happy. And for us, we are back to a cramped up Jeep. But at least when the baby cries he is close enough to reach back and put the pacifier back in his mouth. And when Keegan gets mad and throws his juice at you, it really hits you.

But we will find joy in our Jeep...........So long Ole Blue. We thank you for your 1 year of free service.

KEEGAN VS. MONSTERS VS. ALIENS

Yesterday Matt and I wanted to get out of the house and so we decided to take Keegan to the movie Monsters vs. Aliens. My mom had given us some free movie tickets that she had gotten from rebates that she sent in and the expiration date was yesterday. Matt and I had intended to use the tickets to have a date before baby Myles was born, but that never happened. Can't really remember the last time that we went on a date. I think it was before Keegan was born. Since that obviously didn't happen then I was going to use the tickets to take my mom to a movie when she was here last week. Well time went by too fast and that didn't happen either. Anyways, back to the movie. We needed to use the tickets yesterday or else they would go to waste and I didn't want that to happen. So we thought maybe Keegan would like to see the kid movie. Before we left the house we asked him if he was going to be a good boy at the movie theater. His response "OTAY" We told him that if he was a good boy then we would buy him popcorn. Again "OTAY" so we chose an 11:15 am movie thinking there probably wouldn't be too many other people at that one on a Tuesday, and we were right. Only 1 other guy and little girl. Great!!! So we had to pay 6.50 for a ticket for Keegan. Really!!! He is only 2, and then we had to pay $6.00 for the popcorn. I made Matt stop at the gas station before going so that we could get a soda and candy and sneak them in the diaper bag, grand total $6.10. We got seated and have the popcorn ready to go and for the first 15 minutes of previews Keegan was well behaved eating as much popcorn as he could shovel in. The movie starts and he seems to be doing ok, and then a little while goes by and he seems to be getting a little bored. The movie I must mention was screaming loud and poor little Myles was not too happy about that. So I was trying to hold him and plug his ears. Next thing I know Keegan is off his chair and trying to get past me. I grabbed his arm and sat him back down. Pretty soon this was all that we were doing. He was trying to crawl on the floor past my legs, then he was trying to crawl over the chairs. Threatening to take the popcorn away was not working. He didn't care about the movie and quite frankly neither did I. Next thing we know Keegan has run out of juice. Oh no!!!! "I want Juice daddy, I want Juice" We don't have any more juice, "Scream....more juice daddy"
Finally the only way to quiet him was to put some soda in his cup. We haven't given him soda before, now he kept saying "more daddy, more" Was this movie going to ever end. The answer, Yes, it did finally end and we were all more that willing to leave the theater and decided that taking a 2 year old to the movie, still not a good idea. There is not an alien crazy enough to abduct our little monster. $18.60 later we are on our way home, all a little grumpy. Good news is, the movie tickets didn't expire. Next time we will invest the $18.00 in a babysitter and come home happy.

Sleeping baby

I just can't resist a cute picture. What a sweet baby Myles is. He is so irrisistable.

Cure JM Concert

There are plans to have a Concert here in Hillsboro, OR. Jessica Lerner will be playing Live August 8th 2009. Check out the Concert web page. (Under ongoing construction right now) We hope to see you there.

Please have a look around the web page. more to come as we get closer. Many things happening at the event. And remember this is for a great cause. To help find a Cure for Juvenile Myositis.

<Click Here or the Photo>

1 week old already

My sweet little Myles is 1 week old today. He has been such a good baby. He is eating good and sleeping good. We are so happy to have him here. He is a really good cuddler and I want to hold him all day but I dont. Keegan is slowly adjusting but it has been a hard change for him. Hopefully with time Keegan will begin to enjoy Myles. I just wanted to say that I love this baby. I love both my boys and feel so blessed.

Ready for the road

Baby Myles' 1st trip on the road to Babies-R-Us for a few essentials. He slept the whole time.

Welcome Baby!

Here is the newest addition to our family. I would like to introduce Myles Scott Dallmann.

He was born on March 12, 2009 at 4:44pm. He weighed in at 8lbs. 15.5oz. and 21.5 in.

We are so happy to finally have him here and he is doing great and is healthy.

More pictures and comments to come later after we have had a little sleep.

We love you Myles and we are so happy that you are here.

False Alarm

What a bummer. The hospital sent us back home. Apparently today is not birth day, or at least now. Ho hum..... I know I didn't just wet myself but they say they can't trace any amniotic fluid and I wasn't having much for contractions, so after being there for over 2 hours they sent us home. Better luck next time.

Is Today Birth Day?

Just a quick note. It appears my water broke about 6:30 this morning so we are getting our bags packed and heading to the hospital. Hopefully all goes well and we will be bringing home baby tomorrow. Much love to all.

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Overwhelmed

Do you ever have one of those days, weeks, months where everything just happens at once and it seems like so much you seriously just can't control yourself anymore. I am having one, well all of those. Seriously I feel like I am at my breaking point.
The only problem is, I can't break, there is no time for it. I am just needing to vent. This month has been, well lets just say not so great. There is just too much to deal with all at once. When you think you are getting close to being at the end of it all, more comes. I have been able to steer clear of all the sick cold stuff that has been going around until this weekend. We planned a birthday party for Keegan and don't you know that is when I decide to get a cold. I have a stuffy runny nose topped off with a sore throat. I still have to go to work because I feel like I have to. Taking time off work doesn't seem to be an option for me. So I go to work all morning barely being able to talk and decide to go to the OB doctor in the afternoon because Matt called them and asked if there was over the counter stuff I could take. Well they made it sound like it was a huge deal that I come in and so I agreed only if I didn't have to go back to my original appointment on Thursday. Going to the doctor is one of my least favorite things to do. I take time off work and go only for it to feel like a huge waste of time. All they told me was not to go to work, which again isn't a luxury I feel I have. They told me that when I get home to take it easy. I could have this baby any day. So back to work I go. When I get there I find out that the massage therapist went home sick. This only irrates me because why do I feel like have to be there but everyone else can go home when they are sick. Again I can barely talk. About 4:45 Matt calls me and tells me he is throwing up. Great!!!! Now what am I suppose to do. I go and tell my boss that I have to go and he tell me that I have to stay. Ok so I am sick myself, Matt is now throwing up, I 'm suppose to take it easy because this baby could come any day and I have to stay at work. Not to mention all the other stress that is going on that is a bit more serious than just being sick, but I don't care to talk about it. So I finally get to leave at 5:45 and get home at 6:00 to find Matt seriously sick in the bathroom, the house a complete disaster, Keegan hungry, the dogs outside and have to have their feet wiped and then let in to eat. Trying to light a candle cuz it stinks in here. Trying to do the dishes but Keegan is all over the dishwasher pulling dirty stuff out. Matt calling me on the phone saying he thinks he should eat something. Finding out that all the soup is gone and nobody told me. Seriously at this point I just want to lose it. I don't even have time to be sick. As my boss told me, too many people are counting on me these next few weeks to get things done. I'm overwhelmed. I know it isn't anybody's fault, you can't control being sick. I am just ready for this bad month to go away but I am not ready for this baby to come yet. I really hope that things are going to work out. Mason is going to be ok and the other stressful event will work out for the best and Keegan and I will not start throwing up. That is what I am hoping for, praying for.

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Museum Fun

Birthday Pancakes

Happy 2nd Birthday Keegan

Today is Keegan's 2nd birthday. I can hardly believe that my little babe is already 2 years old. He is such a joy to have and I am so grateful to have him. Here is list of favorite things about him.

He is so funny and always making us laugh
He likes to take baths
He is usually a pretty good eater (chicken nuggets are his favorite)
He is talking really good and knows lots of words
He is usually pretty polite and says thank you and please but he does not like to say sorry
He still lets me rock a bye him for a little while before laying down to sleep
He likes to sing
He really loves to color
He loves to put puzzles together
He will give us goon smiles and then says Damon right after
He loves loves loves to play with his cousin Abby
He loves all his grandparents and asks about all of them
He gives good huggies
He has a cute giggle
Yo Gabba Gabba is his favorite TV show
He has 2 favorite blankets and his Muno doll that he carries around
When we put him to bed at night and cover him with his blankets he always says, "Tank you mama" and "nite nite mama"
He loves to be outside
His favorite movies include Nemo, Happy feet, Polar Express and Wall-e

He likes to dance and has good rhythem

I could go on and on and there is probably something really great that I am forgetting. My life has been so fulfilling since he has come into it. I don't know what I ever did without him. I miss him all day when I am at work and I love to come home to his, usually happy little face standing at the gate shouting Mama....
Happy Birthday baby love, mama loves you so much....

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More "Tookies" Please

Here is my little Valentine after he got up from his nap. He came downstairs and saw that I had made sugar cookies and his eyes lit up and he yelled out "Tookies"

He quickly ate one up and then using his baby sign as well and speaking he kept saying over and over,
"More Tookies Please"

Growing Fast

Keegan was patiently waiting for me to bring him his dinner last night. Then once I gave it to him he wouldn't eat any of it. This is the new thing for him. He crinkles his nose and says "no tank you" anytime we try to feed him anything but toast. Uggh he used to be so good about eating. I am guessing it is just a phase.

Some cute things he is saying and doing now:

When we walk down into the garage Keegan is quick to follow saying " I tumin, I tumin"

During the Christmas season when we would rock Keegan before laying him down he always wanted to look out the window at the neighbors Christmas lights, but he called them "pretty" so when we rock him now he still says that he wants to look at the "pretty" but then when we open the curtin he can see they are gone and so he will say "Merry Missmuss all done"

Since it has been cold season we have had the humidifier on in his room and he will not settle down until he has turned the "midifer on"

Before we can come downstairs he has to go around the upstairs and close all the bedrooms and bathroom doors.

Matt has had a cold for a couple of weeks and has a terrible cough, so now when Matt is coughing Keegan will first say "Daddy otay?" then he will follow it with an "eeewww"

His favorite thing is to get mommies chapstick out of my purse. So his secret valentine gave him his own large chapstick today and he is in heaven.

I can't hardly believe he will be 2 in just 2 weeks. What a joy he has been in our lives. Every day is something new and we love it.

My Emotional Button

Today I had my emotional button pushed to a limit I do not like to be at. I'm to train on a new tool set here at work with a new trainer. We had planned on this week for training but my engineer wanted me to stay where I'm at for a bit longer. I told my trainer that I was going to be available after my break for a little to get a head start. Well, I got back from break and I saw that Heather sent me an email about Mason and that Damon had updated their Blog. So, I was reading them and he came up to me and asked if I was available. I asked if he could give me 5-10 min to finish reading the email and blog. He asked if it was work related. I said no, but it's very important to me and that I would be ready in just a min. He went off saying that I have to start my training. He was being very arrogant about it. I replied by telling him what the emails were about and he still went off about me being off break and I should start training. He just has no Heart. I told him to leave. I understand that it was not work related, but you can't just read a sentence or two of an email and blog about what's going on with Mason and then leave without reading it all. It's just to close to my heart. To me Family Comes 1st! Well, this really tore me up. It was like a stab in the heart. Mason is such a special little boy and I miss him dearly. I can't imagine seeing him right now, but all I want to do is be by his side and talk to him. After a few emails from my dear wife I settled down, but something has changed in me now. I'm that much more eager to find that cure for Juvenile Dermatomyositis. Please, if you are reading this and don't know about the Cure JM foundation just visit http://www.curejm.org/ and read the Smedley Blog and make a donation. A cure is out there, we just have to find it and this take $$.

I miss you Mason. Stay strong and we will see you soon.

Love Uncle,
Matt

Bargain

I have been reading alot on my friends blogs about how good they are doing with their food storage. My mom tells me to get stuff all the time. I am always thinking about it but I never really do anything about it. I will pick up things here and there and we have a shelf out in the garage to store a bit but I always go down and use what we have. So it really has been on my mind alot lately and when I went to Winco tonight they had these Hamburger Helper twin boxes for $.98. Wow what a good deal! This is a lot for hamburger helper that I don't intend to use anytime too soon, but at least it is something to put on my food storage shelf and it didn't break the bank. It's a start in the right direction. I wish I had someone to search out all the great deals and then I could read about it and go to the store and get it. I don't get the paper so I never have coupons and I don't know how everyone finds good deals and free stuff. I don't have time or at least don't want to take the free time I do have to look all that stuff up. I need a good deal on diapers. Especially now that I am going to have 2 in diapers. Well I will let you know when I find another awesome deal. Thanks for all the inspiration to those of you who do a good job on your storage and encourage the rest of us to do the same.

Hello Daddy

While Matt is in California helping out with the Cure JM foundation Convention and Marathon, Keegan and I are enjoying our weekend together at home. Although we haven't been able to do anything too exciting since daddy has been gone because Kee has been a little under the weather. But he is feeling better today. We made this little video for daddy today because I know that he misses Keegan. Keegan wasn't in a very talkative mood but he does miss his daddy and keeps asking for him.

Love you babe. I know it is hard being away but you are learning great things and will be a great support to Damon, Mason and the family and the rest of the Cure JM community. We will see you when you get back.

XOXO,

Keegan and Mommy

Artist after my own heart

Keegan got this sketching board (I forgot the name of these things) for Christmas this year and it has been one of his favorite gifts. He calls it his draw and he plays with it for hours every day. The other day I looked over and he had drawn this smiley face all by himself. I was so impressed. Since then we have been practicing on smiley faces and he has gotten pretty good. He can now draw faces with ears, hair and a neck. He is my little superstar.

Love is...

The scrapbook and rubber stamp classes that I go to started again this month. I went the other night and we were given materials to make a project. They have changed the rules a bit. Instead of making a card or scrapbook page you can make any craft project. They are no longer left at the store to be voted for, but instead you are entered into a drawing for a gift card. So now winning is not based on talent but luck. This is not one of my best pages but I am a little rusty. This is however one of my favorite pictures. I started an 8x8 album for Matt about 3 years ago and I have only done 3 pages. So I decided to make this an 8x8 to go into his book. The items that we had to use were the round flower piece, the red floral paper, 3 small heart brads and a small piece of white ribbon that has valentine on one side. I turned the ribbon over because I didn't want to use the valentine part of it. I used all the items although you can't really make them out. I took this picture with my phone and the camera on there is not so good. I just love scrapbooking but it is so hard with Keegan. He likes all my items as well and they end up all over the place. So I try to do it when he is asleep but he never sleeps long enough for me finish a project. I did get this one done today but not while he was asleep. Matt came home shortly after I put Keegan down and the dogs were upstairs and went crazy when they heard the door open, so naturally it woke Keegan up. Grrrr....... If Matt would let me I would be giving two dogs away. Since he was home he was in charge of Keegan until I could finish. It was fun. Hopefully I can get back in the grove of things again and I can get some of my creativity flowing again.

I want new furniture

It is really hard to talk yourself out of buying something that you know is going to cost a great deal, but you want it soooo bad. And it doesn't help to have a husband that will let you buy whatever you want because he loves to spend money. I have to be the rational one and sometimes I really hate it. We found a sectional couch and chair at Costco that is a really reasonable price considering that it is furniture. But the cost is still expensive. It was just Christmas and we spent plenty of money. Both Matt and I were off work for at least 2 weeks during the snow storm and got paid minimal. I didn't use much of my vacation time because I am trying to save it for March. We have a new baby coming in March and that will cost us plenty not to mention that I don't have much vacation to use and most of my time off will be without pay. All rational reasons as to why we can't buy the new furniture. But, then I think we could sell our current couches and ottoman on Craigslist for a reasonable price. That would bring down our cost. Our house would have more room. I am ready for a change. It feels good to sit on it. I am tired of the great room and the wall to wall furniture. Oh and did I mention that my husband talks about it all the time until I am so crazy and finally want to give in to my irrational thoughts. The problem is when we find a good deal and I talk us out of it because we can't afford it, then when it is gone I am so mad at myself because it was a good deal and we could have saved so much money if we would have just bought it when they had it and it was on sale. Ohhhh what to do...... Do I take the plunge or do I sit back and wait until we can afford it. Can we ever really afford it. Probably not....... something will always come up. An unexpected bill, or something will break and need to be fixed. Our luck kind of runs that way. What to do, what to do...... Should I do it or not..... Matt you can't answer that, I already know your vote.